Callings

 

Scripture    John 21:1-17

In the Oscar-winning movie “Ordinary People”, Conrad – played by Timothy Hutton – is a teenager traumatized by the death of his more popular older brother Buck. Caught on a sinking boat in a storm, Conrad chose to hang on to the boat while Buck let go and drowned. Knowing he would have drowned if he let go too, yet plagued with survivor’s guilt, Conrad hangs on to more than the boat, and life all around nearly drowns him in the process. He attempts suicide. He recovers, but he continues to struggle – and struggle mightily.

Until the breakthrough comes. Conrad’s psychiatrist – played by Judd Hirsch – helps Conrad claim his decision to stay with the boat in order to remain alive. “Now, you can live with that, can’t you?” he tells the young man. “You’re here and you’re alive. And don’t tell me you don’t feel that.” “It doesn’t feel good!” Conrad cries. “It is good” the doctor replies, “Believe me.”

“How do you know?”

   “Because … I’m your friend.”
“You’re really my friend?”
   “I am. Count on it.”

At one time or another in our lives, each of us finds ourselves clinging to our fragile craft, wondering whether or not what we do – perhaps who we are – really counts in this world.

The apostle Peter clung to his, knowing he had denied Jesus three times in the temple courtyard before his crucifixion. Knowing, at the same time, he might have suffered the same agonizing fate if he had not done so. Clinging to his boatload of guilt and grief – he had survived, and Jesus had not –  Peter returned to his fishing career. Career, from the Latin word carrera – which means racetrack. As in rat race. As in circles.

Here was Peter: self-propelled, without a rudder. Whereas fishing was his career, fishing for others had been his vocation – from the Latin word vocare, meaning to call. “Follow me,” Jesus had called … and Peter had followed. It was a calling that died with the last cry on the cross. Vocation gone, it was back to the boat.

Until – in a chain of extraordinary events – resurrection overtakes Peter and the rest. Teaching them three things about Christian calling, or vocation, that could only be learned in the practice of community. As opposed to the solitary career of their fish-forsaken boat.

Vocation Principle #1: Knowing that we – each of us – has a calling. It is that simple. And it can be that hard.

Knowing that we each have a calling means being vulnerable enough to discover it. Like Peter in this story, when we catch a glimpse of holy, we discover how naked we really are. And so we are tempted to toss on whatever career garb we may have – whatever propels us around the racetrack of life – and jump with Peter into a sea of activity.

We may know what we are good at and what we are to go after – what seas to jump into – and yet, in the midst of it all, do we know what God is after with us? We may applaud the resurrection of Easter … but do we know that resurrection is also supposed to be our own? Our career may be a good thing … as long as it is rooted in the calling – the vocation – each of us has. Then again, some of us have never had a “career”; every one of us, however, has a calling.

Vocation Principle #2: Knowing that we each have a call from God, we listen for it. Let’s return to the story: “Jesus said to them, ‘Come and have breakfast.’ Now none of the disciples dared to ask him, ‘Who are you?’ because they knew it was the Lord.”

And why should they ask? They know they are in the presence of something sacred – something holy. They know they needn’t say a single word. They simply join Jesus at the feast he has prepared. It’s the common table, the place where Jesus can best be heard. It’s the place of calling – of deepest listening – of knowing whose we are before knowing who we are. It’s the place where we discover all count (vocation) before we even know how (career). It’s the place of faith and faithful community, where we can hear God into speech through each other, and hold each other accountable all along.

Listening for our call. We cannot do it alone. And we must do it first, before sounding our trumpet. The Episcopalian cleric and writer Barbara Brown Taylor is an attentive observer of the holy in God’s word and our world. She notes that while emphasis is placed in the New Testament on proclaiming the Word, the emphasis in the Old Testament is on hearing the word: “Hear, O Israel, the Lord your God, the Lord is one.” Knowing each of has a call from God, we listen for it in the presence of community, for the benefit of the community. Only then can we share it – not vice versa.

Vocation Principle #1: Each of us has a call to be heard ... Vocation Principle #2: At the table of fellowship where all are counted, we listen for our call to serve the common good ...

... Both leading to Vocation Principle #3: We respond to our call.

Listen to Jesus and Peter go at it here. “Simon (Peter), do you love me?” … “Simon, do you love me?” … “Simon, do you love me?” And Simon says, each and every time, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”

So far, so good. There’s no mistaking it: Simon’s feeling of affection is present. And yet in calling us to love him, Jesus is not looking for a feeling of affection – not primarily, at least. Jesus is looking for love through service. Service for the common good.

Jesus frames the service for Simon Peter – and for us all – in these three ways: “Feed my lambs.” “Tend my sheep.” “Feed my sheep.”

“Feed – Tend – Feed.” For Simon Peter – for us all – loving Jesus is framed by the act of feeding, made known through the common meal they are sharing at that very moment. When the gospels were written, the common meal was not simply a liturgical act; it was an act of justice. Nowhere else I know in the Roman Empire were the poor fed with the rich, and vice versa.

Now, “Feed my lambs” and “Feed my sheep” are metaphors, of course; Jesus’ call to service expects more than serving food here. And yet, let us be careful: Jesus does not expect of us anything less. Anything less than feeding and tending. Anything less than proper food, clothing, housing, and health care. Serving the common good through our call begins and ends there; otherwise, it wouldn’t be common, and it wouldn’t be good. “Feed – tend – and feed”: American individualists, we are. And yet, as Christians first, we respond to that call.

 

Vocation Principle #1: Everyone has a call. Even the Peters who turn their backs on Jesus. Even the Peters who cling to their careers, fleeing from the scene when vulnerability threatens. Even the Peters who would love Jesus affectionately, thinking that should be enough.

Principle #2: Because each of us has a call, we are bidden to listen for it amidst God’s common table of fellowship. We cannot hear that call alone.

Principle #3: Hearing our calling in the context of faith community, we respond with our calling by promoting the common good.

  We each have a call. What is it for you?